I went to a wedding last night. It was quite lovely, and lots of fun. My feet are actually sore today from dancing in my uncomfy heels to songs like "Billie Jean," "Like a Prayer," and "Sexy Back." However, weddings in general I think, need some spice. Most weddings these days have the same parts and pieces. Sure, there are creative touches added here and there - in food, in decoration, in venue, in transportation, flowers, invitations, etc., but I think there needs to be a bit of creativity in the actual ceremony. I can offer two creative changes right now:
1. THE RING. Okay, so you're at that part in the ceremony when the pastor says, "Groom, what symbol did you bring to give to Bride to prove to her your everlasting love?" The groom then says, "A ring." HO HUM. Everyone does the ring! How cool would it be if he brought something like: "This old sweatshirt - I was wearing it the day we met." Or perhaps something a little more creative: "This bowl of Fruit Loops - she loves it when I make her breakfast in bed. This is a symbol to show my undying devotion to service to my wife." *Sigh* How beautiful. There wouldn't be a dry eye in the room.
2. UNITY CANDLE. Seriously folks, this is way old. Two candles, lighting one together, you stand there awkwardly while the rest of the song plays, blah blah blah. . . . How about burning something a little more exciting? Give the guests something to LOOK at during the song. How about burning a pile of pictures of old girlfriends/boyfriends? Maybe its just a unity bonfire of sorts, where guests can add a log to the fire signifying their committment to helping you keep your vows to each other. I think a big warm toasty fire could be very symbolic AND entertaining! Maybe the whole congregation could hold hands around the fire and sing camp fire songs you learned while working at camp together back in the day.....
We need originality. Any other ideas?
4 comments:
Amo, I think that you and I have had this conversation before. I too, am sick of traditional weddings. I can't even stand to have people talk about them while they are planning -- it makes me nuts. I admire your ability to put up with brides.
My ideas:
Ceremony in the middle of the reception. You know, just for spice (like an after dinner dessert -- eat cake, say I DO).
Let your guests plan the wedding online. Have a website, and several options for the wedding (colors, etc.) Let your family and friends plan the wedding. THey would all have something to talk about when they got there (what they voted for).
Arts and Crafts -- who doesn't like making something crafty? There should be a project for all of the guests to do. They could either all collaborate on one project, or they could all submit entries and have a competition.
I hate unity candels.
Have a hip hop dance teacher come in and teach everyone a dance.
Best men/ Maids of Honor should think of a change that surprises the bride and groom in the middle of the ceremony. Like, they have random people in the congregation stand up and tell great attributes of the couple and why they are good together. Or, they could have U2 come out and play With Or Without You in the middle of the ceremony -- awesome surprise.
man, if i would have read that first my wedding would TOTALLY have been planned online by my guests.
things i hate about weddings:
garters
toss away bouquets
waiting forever to get to eat
I hate unity candles, too.
I also hate the stuff people hang on the end of pews.
I hate roast beef being cut by a man under a bright light.
Ask me when I have a ring on my finger, but as of now... I'd like to have a casual church wedding, with a back yard BBQ after. I want it to be FUN!
But we'll see, maybe I turn into Bridezilla once I get engaged, who knows!
Amy,
You are soooo right on.
As you know, I have performed many weddings and have had to suffer through some of the wierd reasons why a very non-traditional, postmodern couple would want to replicate a very medieval or victorian traditional ceremony. Don't get me wrong, I like some traditions and think we need them, but most couples are unaware of their implications or significance (or lack thereof).
I love some of the above ideas and have actually performed them.
One wedcding (Brian & Sarah)we interviewed each of the couple with 5 questions designed specifically for them. This engaged the audience (it was a big wedding)in a huge way. For instance, Who introduced you to your bride-to-be and what were the circumstances? or What was your first date like? The couple heard these questions for the first time on stage, so they were "real" answers.
Another wedding was held at a park as a giant "cookout" with volleyball, horseshoes, tag football etc...and a big bondfire. We held the "ceremony" in the middle of all that, which was really crazy but great fun. I'm certainly glad no one was hurt. We didn't trivialize anything...we just had fun doing it. And it was so informal that if someone didn't repeat a word correctly, well, we just laughed and had a great time doing it right. What memories!!!
At most weddings I want to take a coffe break during the unity candle part and ask the audience some of their ideas about the couple or show a video of the couple's baby picts.LOL
I think the ceremony should include the man washing the feet of his bride as he says his vows and vica versa. Might be smelly by humbling.
I love your comments...put them in a book.
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